I lost my heart to a meathook

Lost in Translation was great, really great. I'm glad I didn't see the trailer ahead of time as I don't think it described the movie very well. I thought Kelly's character was supposed to be a take on Drew Barrymore, but turns out it was a take on Cameron Diaz. Yeah, I can see that. And despite her 50/50 trach record regarding movies, Scarlett is on my crush list to stay.

Dinner was good. The manicotti turned out pretty well, but the dessert was a little, well, soupy. I wasn't sure what to expect, but anything with pumpkin in it is good.

Valentine's Day was good, but I think Marie was a little let down. I choose homebody activities instead of going out. I got her a radio/CD player for at work and she got me a book from The Onion. Quite excelent.

I might need to rip this idea off...http://www.tenyearsofmylife.com/

If I was granted a second superpower, it would be the ability to keep fresh food fresh indefinitely. I'd eat much more salad if the effing bag of lettuce lasted longer than three days before going bad. Same for yogurt.

Tonight, a winner will be decided in the cribbage tournament. Terry, while a great friend, will have no choice but to succumb to my pegging greatness. I can almost hear my new CD...

Am I the only one who emails myself (from work to home) to remind myself of things later on?

9 days till Rollins...

I know you.

You were too short. You had bad skin. You couldn't talk to them very well. Words didn't seem to work. They lied when they came out of your mouth. You tried so hard to understand them. You wanted to be part of what was happening. You saw them having fun and it seemed like such a mystery, almost magic. Made you think that there was something wrong with you. You'd look in the mirror, trying to find it. You thought you were ugly and that everyone was looking at you. So you learned to be invisible, to look down, to avoid conversation. The hours, days, weekends. Ah, the weekend nights alone. Where were you? In the basement? In the attic? In your room? Working some job, just to have something to do? Just to have a place to put yourself? Just to have a way to get away from them? A chance to get away from the ones who made you feel so strange and ill-at-ease inside yourself.

Did you ever get invited to one of their parties? You sat and wondered if you'd go or not. For hours, you imagined the scenarios that might transpire - if they would laugh at you, if you would know what to do, if you would have the right things on, if they would notice that you came from a different planet. Did you get all brave in your thoughts? Like you were going to go in there and deal with it, and have a great time. Did you think that you might be 'the life of the party'? That all these people were going to talk with you, and you would find out that you were wrong, that you had a lot of friends, and that you weren't so strange after all? Did you end up going? Did they mess with you? Did they single you out? Did you find out that you were invited because they thouhgt you were so weird?

Yeah, I think I know you. You spent a lot of time full of hate, a hate that was pure as sunshine, a hate that saw for miles, a hate that kept you up at night, a hate that filled your every waking moment, a hate that carried you for a long time. Yes, I think I know you. You couldn't figure out what they saw in the way they lived. Home was not home. Your room was home. A corner was home. The place they weren't, that was home.

I know you. You're sensitive and you hide it, because for fear getting stepped on one more time. It seems like when you show a part of yourself that is the least bit vulnerable, someone takes advantage of you. One of them steps on you. They mistake kindness for weakness, but you know the difference. You've been the brunt of their weakness for years and strength is something that you know a bit about because you had to be strong to keep yourself alive. You know yourself very well now and you don't trust people. You know them too well.

You try to find that special person, someone you can be with, someone you can touch, someone you can talk to, someone you won't feel so strange around. And you've found that they don't really exist. You feel closer to people on movie screens. Yeah, I think I know you.

You spend a lot of time daydreaming and people have made comment to that effect, telling you that you're self-involved and self-centered. But they don't know, do they? About the long night shifts alone, about the years of keeping yourself company. All the nights you wrapped your arms around yourself, so you could imagine someone holding you. The hours of indecision, self-doubt, the intense depression, the blinding hate, the rage that made you stagger, the devistation of rejection.

Well, maybe they do know. But if they do, they sure do a good job of hiding it. It astounds you how they can be so smooth, how they seem to pass through life as if life itself was some divine gift. And it infuruates you to watch yourself, with your apparent skill in finding every way possible to screw it up. For you, life is a long trip, terrifying and wonderful. Birds sing to you at night. The rain and the sun, the changing seasons are true friends. Solitiude is a hard won ally, faithful and patient.

Yeah, I think I know you.

I did all my acid in Grade 8

I got new speakers over the weekend for the computer. They are really quite great and were only $40. I also should get some award or plaque for having the first and second seasons of The Simpsons in my hands and not buying them. It was hard.

I have an aching desire to go on a picnic.

Is this not the greatest/ugliest thing you've ever seen? And, it's all mine!!
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3659940797. I swooped in at the last minute and outbid the high bidder! I hate it when people do that, except when those people are me!!

Marie and I are going to see Mona Lisa Smile tomorrow night - $1 tickets at the budget. My parents might come along. If I had half a brain, this would've been part of my Valentine's Day plans and I would've come out a hero.

The office has held a strange combination of smells today. Upon recently walking past the lobby, the smell of cinnamon and bacon combined, causing me to wince. Would it be weird to have an air freshener in my office?